WEEKLY MARITAL DIGEST

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HOW DID IT DIE?

Last time, it was about the importance of romance in marriage. This time, let’s take a look, together, at how it gradually gets lost in marriage;

Activities such as holding hands, kissing, cuddling in bed, lovemaking, etc, are often on our romance bucket list prior to marriage. But why do most on our list are usually left unchecked forever or even the romance map gets lost along the way when only followed for a few years?

Gradually, we find romance starting to evade from our equations and coitus (lovemaking) steadily follows. Just because we become busy and do not mind anymore or because we now have the children watching and more financial goals are waiting to be achieved. Hence, couples who have been once intimately connected can find themselves evolving into mere neighbors with shared responsibilities alone.

When some couples are asked, “When was the last time your inner room got engaged?”

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The answers would be, “a month, two, three, four, five, six months…” And some would even count years! Yeah! Don’t be surprised, some couples haven’t had it together in more than a year!

But how? How did they get there? Ask them; they’d have to ransack their brains for an answer because they also don’t know how until the question hits them.

And it all started… It all started from ignoring the small gestures simply because they’re stressed from their daily life activities. They don’t know that an ordinary touch from one another could mean a lot. Yet, these gestures are the language of love, communicating the message, “I see you, and you still matter.”

One thing about love is that it needs replenishment. Love, just like a car whose engine needs to be refueled for continuous function, also needs these small gestures to remain active. Once a car is ignored and not fueled, many parts gradually start to malfunction until it’s totally pronounced condemned. So is love! – neglecting these essential acts of love can lead to the gradual malfunctioning of various aspects of the relationship until it is deemed irreparable…

From ignoring the small gestures to the expectancy of who? Who is going to initiate the romance? Who will initiate the coitus? The questions we fail to ask each other or rather ask each other with actions. Now, let me leave this floor with the question – whose duty is it? To initiate sex and romance in marriage?

Your beloved,

Ummu Abdillah – Kafayat Olubukola 💞

About Post Author

Ummu Abdillah

Jayeoba Kafayat Modupeoluwa, mostly known as Ummu Abdillah is a Technologist in Electronics and Telecommunication engineering but presently only active as an Islamic writer - so do not bother to ask her about diodes and electromagnetic waves 🤗. Happily married and recently gifted a princess. She is a lover of teenagers and marriage and does make it her occupation to study them. Also, she's a knowledge seeker who loves to learn new things every second and teaches them as well to whoever cares to learn.
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