Romance in Marriage
Prior to getting married, many of us do have our romance map layouts with well-detailed instructions – morning kisses, joint tahjud, kitchen romance, coitus/lovemaking under the shower/in the bathtub, endearing names and activities, etc… We do have long to-do list and expectations! Because we believe we’re getting married to the love of our lives and want to experience a happy lifetime with them. But we get disappointed when we realize that our partners don’t have these same expectations 😄. In fact, some partners are zero when it comes to romance.
A woman once narrated how her husband who she has been calling by his name and other romantic names since pre-wedding forbade her from doing so after having their first child. He had stubbornly instructed her to call her by her daughter’s name.
Another woman recalled how, one day, just not long after their wedding, her husband started behaving coldly to her romantic gestures – each time she ran to him when he returned from work for a hug or to remove his suit, she’d be shunned.
Set AWỌN OLD FASHIONED MEN!😄
We are striving to publish our stories. Please, kindly click on the link below to support and donate for Allah’s sake!
And I’ve heard of some women who never agree with such men. Yes! They’re stubborn and persistent in their romance until the husband gets used to it. They jokingly trash their anti-romance reaction and keep on giving in their best. Why?
THEY NEVER MIND that they’re the sole romantic contributor🤷
Also, some men do grumble about their wives’ lack of romance, which makes some favour and prefer spending quality time with the so-called side chicks!
Truly, in a marriage, both couples have to contribute; this brings and builds mutual confidence and a sense of belonging. But we’re raised differently and have different convictions. Still, no matter what, let not the light of romance off in your house even if you’re the only one fueling it. What matters is the final result and Allah is going to crown your efforts.
So, what can we do to keep the romance alive in our marriages? Here are some tips:
•Communicate openly with your partner about your expectations and desires when it comes to romance. Don’t assume that they know what you want or need.
•Be willing to compromise and find a middle ground that works for both of you. Maybe your partner isn’t into morning kisses, but they’re willing to cuddle with you before bed.
•Keep things fresh and exciting by trying new activities together or surprising each other with little gestures of love and affection.
•Remember that romance is not just about physical intimacy, but also emotional connection and communication. Take time to really listen to your partner and show them that you care.
•Don’t give up on romance just because your partner isn’t as enthusiastic as you are. Keep putting in effort and eventually, they may come around.
•Even if they don’t come around, hold on to the key of romance and unleash the excitement each and every time you want. If you don’t know, he or she will always remember and cherish you for that either openly or secretly.
Remember, a happy marriage takes work from both partners, but the rewards are well worth it. So don’t be afraid to be the romantic one in your relationship – it could lead to a lifetime of love and happiness.
The best of mankind is a good example for us. In his marriage with every one of his wives, romance is clearly perceived. Take this narration for instance,
Once the Prophet (pbuh) was sitting in a room with Aisha (RA) and fixing his shoes. It was very warm, and Aisha looked at his blessed forehead and noticed that there were beads of sweat on it. She became overwhelmed by the majesty of that sight and was staring at him long enough for him to notice.
He said, “What’s the matter?” She replied, “If Abu Bukair Al-Huthali, the poet, saw you, he would know that his poem was written for you.” The Prophet (Sallallahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) asked, “What did he say?” She replied, “Abu Bukair said that if you looked at the majesty of the moon, it twinkles and lights up the world for everybody to see.” So the Prophet (salla Allahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) got up, walked to Aisha, kissed her between the eyes, and said, “Wallahi ya Aisha, you are like that to me and more.”
You see? He, s.a.w, was even tagged THE BEST OF ALL HUSBAND. That title doesn’t come with no-effort. Therefore, no matter what it takes, never give up on your romantic life. Keep the fire burning!
As-salaamu’alykum warahmatullah wabarakaatuhu!
Ummu Abdillah 💞
Jayeoba Kafayat Modupeoluwa, mostly known as Ummu Abdillah is a Technologist in Electronics and Telecommunication engineering but presently only active as an Islamic writer – so do not bother to ask her about diodes and electromagnetic waves 🤗. Happily married and recently gifted a princess.
She is a lover of teenagers and marriage and does make it her occupation to study them.
Also, she’s a knowledge seeker who loves to learn new things every second and teaches them as well to whoever cares to learn.