HOW WILL I COPE? – Episode 4

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Read Time:10 Minute, 18 Second

ABDURRAHMAN {Abu Yaseer}

Just opening my eyes, I hear the Adhan. I check my watch, it is almost time for Fajr Salat. I get up, walk into the bathroom to perform Wudh’u. Back into the room, I catch sight of my wife, still sleeping soundly like a baby. She is so fragile, easily gets hurt. I wish to never make her cry.

“Alhamdulillah for giving me this precious gem and never let me regret this my action Ya Allah! You know the best of my intention,” I sincerely pray.

I walk towards the bed and give her a peck on the cheek and this wakes her.

Trying to open her eyes, “Fajr?” She asks

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“Yes dear”, I reply, dressing up.

“You have taken your bathe already and you didn’t wake me?” she frowns, trying to get up as well.

“I’m very sorry, I did that after you slept off and I didn’t want to interrupt your sound sleep. I have stressed you too much “, I reply jokingly. She smiles.

She sluggishly gets off the bed. She still looks stressed, poor girl! I watch her as she walks into the bathroom to purify herself for Salat.

Now off to Masjid, it remains just 15 minutes for the Salat to commence and I want to pray the Nawafil before the Salat because there is no Nawafil after Fajr Salat, so I hurry. Entering the Masjid, my eyes come in contact with Abu Summayah’s and he makes a gesture to greet me. I also reply him with gesture and I start to pray my Nawafil…

After the congregation Fajr prayer, I start my morning Adhkars. I can sense Abu Summayah’s glances, maybe he is waiting for me. I’m just guessing but I’m not sure. I am not sure he saw me last night, only if he did then my presumption will be right.

Finishing my Adhkar, and about to exit the Masjid I hear his Salaam from behind, he catches up with me outside the Masjid. We exchange greetings and he asks me to spare him some of my time. We walk towards a shade where we sit.

“Akhi, I saw you last night at my house. What brought you there?” He asks.

“I was coming from Masjid when I heard their voices. I knew that was your house so I wondered what was happening, that was why I came in…” I am saying before he cuts in.

“I was very ashamed of myself when I saw you there yesterday especially when they got you involved. In fact, those women are just becoming something else. I’m very sorry for any trouble they caused you” he says obvious sense of remorse.

“Sir, you don’t have to! I can understand but sir, something bothered me since yesternight” I say

“Go ahead, dear brother, what is it?” He asks.

“I heard those women are your wives and I didn’t expect to see you just watch them fight as you did, why? I hope no problem?” I ask with concern.

“Hmm! They are truly my wives but what they did yesterday was beyond my control. I had to leave them to finish what they started, then I got back to them. You know what my brother? Women have no limit when they fight each other. My wives were fighting with their eyes closed. Had I made any effort to stop them, they wouldn’t have obeyed me and it would be so shameful. Thanks to the presence of all of you yesterday night, they would have harmed themselves” he says.

“Polygamy!” I exclaim

“Why Akhi? Even women who do not share the same husband and do not live under the same roof do quarrel, that is women for you, complex in creation, complex in nature….” He tries to explain while I cut in trying to stop this lengthy talk on polygamy. He is already discouraging me.

“You are right sir, they are complex. Meanwhile, I hope everything is well now? How are they?”

“They? You mean my wives?” I nod in affirmation “Both of them are now in their parents’ houses?” He says with confidence.

This takes me aback. “Why their parents houses? Don’t tell me you divorce them sir”, I ask with curiosity. Now I adjust my sitting position willing to hear more!

“Yes, their parents’ houses! They also knew right from the start that they would go there whenever they initiate such war in my house. This has been my policy ever since they became two. I usually send them to their parents to go and learn more marital etiquettes for like a month or two. I have been overlooking their misdeeds for some time, now they have gone to the extreme. My patience with them over time gave them the audacity to fight to that extent yesterday. They thought I would just pardon them as usual but they even involved their children! No, they went too far and they are spending two months In Shaa Allah without any kobo from me…”

I cut in, “but sir, isn’t that too much for them and for you and what about the children?”

Ahah, no! I can hold myself for that long and they also can. They will remain with their families until they feel remorseful. Ya Akhi, by the time they return to my house they would have learnt their lesson. Thereafter, they will strive to keep peace in my house. See, they are also women of the Deen but sometimes they submit to emotions. Thank Allah, the children are happy together, they can take care of themselves. My Summayah is now 24yrs of age and my Maymunah will soon clock 20, I’m even planning Nikkah for both of them very soon Insha Allah”, he says.

“OK sir, Barakallahu Fihi! But Sir, I’m sorry to ask you this question, why did you marry two wives in the first place.”

“Hmm! Akhi , whenever I think about why I married a second wife I am always saddened. All the time, seek Istighfar from Allah because I didn’t do it for His sake then. I had very little or no knowledge of this Deen. Perhaps, the chaos that sometimes happen in my family has to do with my intention then. My first wife was young and lovely when I married her. Within 4 years of our marriage we had three lovely daughters already, it was very very fast. However, I wasn’t happy because they are all females. I had this special passion for a male child because I am the only child and son of my Mum. My mum was my Dad’s third wife. Out of impatience, after our third daughter was born, I took in another wife with the hope of having male children. This changed my first wife completely because I did it when she never expected it. It was like stabbing her at the back. I didn’t even inform her because I heard there is no delil that necessitates informing one’s wife before taking in another wife and I never care even though I heard there is no delil that forbids informing her either. Now I realise that I think informing one’s wife seems to guarantee peace more than not telling her at all. Like I said, my wife changed from a lovely wife to an aggressive woman and even became worse when she heard I married because of male children. To worsen the situation, my new wife assumes the position of a boss in the house because she is the elder. It wasn’t fun then Akhi, despite marrying a second wife, I still haven’t had a son. You see the work of Allah? Allahu Akbar..” he says with traces of pain in his voice, he continues “but Alhamdulillah, after Allah has straightened my way in the Deen, everything about myself and my home has become better. Alhamdulillah! I can feel the sweetness of polygamy now unlike before. Though I still regret my mistake, polygamy is enjoyable Akhi if you do it according to Sunnah and for the sake of Allah alone. People practice polygamy for different reasons, and their results differ. The success of polygamy is a function of ‘why you do it!’ Learn from my mistake my dear brother” he concludes with a sigh.

“Alhamdulillah sir, I really thank Allah for you. May Allah forgive us and our shortcomings” I pray and we both chorus Ameen as both of us stand- up, he shakes me with a passion.

“Thank you very much for your time Akhi, Jazaakallah Khairan! I really appreciate this. It is good to have a brother to talk to” he says with a smile and I can see the relief in him. Now I notice some white hairs in his beards, still his beards look lovely.

“Ameen, wa Antum Fajazaakumullah Khairan. You are very welcome sir” I also reply with a smile. It is Sunnah!

We set off to our homes, On my way, many thoughts creep into my mind. “People practice polygamy for different reasons,” really? Am I really doing mine for the sake of Allah? This thought alone makes me feel terrified. What if I am not and Allah punishes me also for it. Now, I’m not sure…

 

Now reaching our estate, as I enter the gate I see Ummu Yaseer waiting patiently for me in front of our apartment. I check my wrist watch as I walk forward, Subhanallah! It is past 7 already. Chai… I should have sent an sms to her that I would be this late.

“I’m sorry dear, I was conversing with someone at the Masjid”, I say as I approach.

“You should have at least sent a text message to me. I was so worried because it is very unusual of you”, she replies as she tries to get back into the house when I take hold of her hand and I draw her back.

“Your Niqab is not well tied, let me help you”

“Don’t worry, I just put it on to wait for you outside. I’m taking it off now”, she replies while I insist.

Standing still, I start tying her Niqab. I learned to do this perfectly from my Ummu. A male neighbour who recently packed in with his family just about two weeks passes in front of our apartment, he stares at us and I never care about any public decorum when showing my wife love, in as much as it is Halal. The man stares at us even more like we are acting a play.

“He cannot even greet.” I murmur, “now, it is done”, I say while she turns to face me.

“Habeeby, I hope you will never stop caring for me”, she says softly.

“In shaa Allah! Habeebaty, in as much as I’m alive with you”, I reply.

We both enter with these thoughts still clouding my mind. I do not ever want to see the other side of my wife. This side of her is the best. I am not sure of what the other side could look like. I really have no idea because we have never fought. We even rarely have an argument.

Today is Sunday, I have to go to the gym. I think I have to stop at Zaynab’s residence, we have to talk! I quickly rush into the bathroom, dress up in my sportswear. and I pick up my car key; about to go out when she calls on me,

“Wait, why hurrying?”, She shouts from the kitchen.

She comes to me and hands me a plate of cookies.

“Ma Sha Allah! I have really missed your cookies since the kids have gone for holiday”, I smile. “I may be a little late dear, I have to stop over at somewhere”.

“Somewhere? Where, if I may ask?”, she queries.

I can sense suspicion in her question. How will I tell her I want to stop over at my Mathna to-be house? It will just upset her or make her cry till I return again.

“Just somewhere Habeebaty, don’t worry I will be back before Asr” I give her a kiss, say my Salaam and hurry out before she could say another word.

“Don’t take too long o, you know I’m the only one at home”, she says as I drive off…

About Post Author

Ummu Abdillah

Jayeoba Kafayat Modupeoluwa, mostly known as Ummu Abdillah is a Technologist in Electronics and Telecommunication engineering but presently only active as an Islamic writer - so do not bother to ask her about diodes and electromagnetic waves 🤗. Happily married and recently gifted a princess. She is a lover of teenagers and marriage and does make it her occupation to study them. Also, she's a knowledge seeker who loves to learn new things every second and teaches them as well to whoever cares to learn.
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